“What is your definition of a beautiful and wholesome human being?”

I asked Misorang about two thirds into my espresso. This was our very first time meeting each other but I just knew I would really like this person as soon as I sat down at an aussie-theme cafe, which we picked to connect with our cultural roots: she an aussie, I a kiwi.

She was vivacious, bright and had eyes that sparkled like a young girl full of curiosity for life. But she was also a well-seasoned professional of eight years in TV broadcasting with the depth of understanding and reflection about life that, I could only presume, would have come from her years of own struggles, stories, and of course, successes as she transitioned from her dental career in Australia to TV career in her motherland almost by accident or through several incidents.

“Hrm…”

She stirred the ice in her flat-white and then spoke with the same cheeriness that she had since the beginning of our conversation.

“Someone who is honest with one’s desires.”

Ah, this was not what I expected. Instantly intrigued.

Please, explain.

“You know, sometimes you are frowned upon if you express your desires too strongly. But I think a healthy, successful and happy adult is when you know what you desire in life and are able to direct your life towards it by working hard and being true to yourself.”

She added,

“And most of the time, I realised people are not as self-centered as we think and are capable of pursuing desires that can benefit both themselves and others.”

Driving back home, I repeatedly scribbled her words in my mind. As a grown-up, we are taught to be better at hiding ourselves. The number of masks we wear grows even more: home, school, work, relationships, etc. So it was refreshing to hear that perhaps growing up to be a healthy, beautiful human being is the opposite of that: to be more honest and straightforward about your desires and to pursue the life you desire.

What makes you happy?

What gives you fulfilment?

What kind of relationship do you desire?

What kind of value do you want to contribute to this world?

These are all questions that we must ask ourselves constantly in order to find our utmost desires that will fuel, drive, and empower our lives. And these are exactly the kind of questions that we are posing to all our guests and audience at HERSTORY.

Starting now.

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Misorang is an aussie dentist turned TV presenter in South Korea. Eight years into broadcasting business, she sits down with Francheska for a high-energy, lot-of-laughs, and deep conversation about the importance of taking “actions”, and how they could open doors for unexpected but new opportunities, her own testimonial of undergoing depression, and the “toolkits” for nurturing both the inner and outer beauty as she navigates one of the most visual industry in South Korea.

Francheska: My dearest Misorang! Thank you so much for joining us today. It really is rather difficult for me to hide my affection for you because we both share a common root, the “kiwi land” (a.k.a New Zealand). And here we are today, wonderfully paving our own career path in South Korea’s media scene. What I love about your story is that you were on a completely different path before your current job. Please tell us, what happened there?

Misorang: Thank you Cheska! And you mentioned kiwi-land, which is where I started my schooling. I then moved to Australia where I did my dental school and worked as a dentist. But a few years into my studies, I had two big awakening moments, so to speak, that made me pivot to South Korea. The first one came in my second year of dental school, while still an undergrad, I fell into severe clinical depression. Because I was so young, I had not quite yet understood that this can happen to anyone and everyone, which made me feel lonelier and feel like a catastrophic failure because I had never gone through anything like it before.

Francheska: You must have been very confused.

Misorang. I was and fortunately there wasn’t much stigma attached to mental depression in Australia so I did get treatment and help but I wish there had been more resources or platform available at the time. That would have helped me get the treatment faster and made the process more soothing than like a fatalistic sadness haha

Francheska: I completely agree, which is why I think it is so great that we are talking about this and you also share it openly on your social media as well to encourage people to seek help.

Misorang: Yes, and because there is still stigma attached to mental illnesses in South Korea, I have been given advice not to talk about it as much for the benefit of my career but honestly, I would not be who I am today if I didn’t go through what I did. Having gone through it, I also gained greater compassion and empathy for others as well as “tool kits” I have developed during my treatment, which is a term I like to use for better managing the ups and downs of my life. I am able to recover quickly and also sense them before I fall too below the line.

Francheska: That is a profound gain you have had from those experiences. What are some of those tool kits that you still use?

Misorang: Gratitude journal is one of them. I know it may sound cheesy but this has really helped me understand it's not about the actual experiences but how we interpret them that can evoke either positive or negative feelings. I use my iphone now because I can jot them down quickly before I forget but also because my mum started reading my journal (laughs)

Francheska: Ahahaha!

Misorang: Yes… she would read my physical journal so I had to go the more digital and encrypted method of recording...ha..ha. Also, I try very hard to maintain a very positive internal dialogue. And also being okay with asking for help. This was the toughest thing for me because I felt it was a sign of weakness or admitting my own ineptitude. But now I know when I am coming to that breaking point, and accept when I need help.

Francheska: I think many people could relate to that. Not wanting to burden someone else with my problems but also showing and admitting that I lack the capacity to handle all. But admitting that, in essence, is a step towards honesty and self-care I believe. Now, what is one piece of advice that has served you well?

Misorang: My therapist once told me that we have to be our own “mother”. It took me a while to fully understand what that meant. But when you are a goal-oriented, high achieving person, you tend to value and evaluate yourself based on the output and neglect other aspects of what constitutes you as a whole person. But a good mother, (emphasis on the good!) would make sure to take care of it all and sometimes put much more value and love on things other than the actual outcome. So I try to maintain a very positive internal dialogue. You have to be your own coach, cheer-leader, and your care-giver.

And loving yourself despite it all, regardless of, and may be because of.

Francheska: There is no denial that working in certain industries, such as media, broadcast, entertainment, there is a big emphasis on “appearance”. How do you stay true to your core and make sure you balance on nurturing both the inner and the outer beauty?

Misorang: You are absolutely right in that it is a very visual industry and you can get swept up with all the superficial things if you aren’t firmly rooted in our own values. What I try to do is to spend as much time with people outside of the industry and to surround myself with everything but that industry to balance it out.

There is a saying in our industry that you have to choose “between looking good in front of the camera or off-camera” meaning if you look “good” on camera you are probably underweight and not healthy off camera. Unfortunately for young girls starting out in the industry, because everyone is at a similar starting point in terms of skills and experiences, they can get caught up in promoting themselves through visuals.

Francheska: And I find conversations like these are important so that people know what they should expect or how to prepare before going into an industry where they might have to sacrifice both their health and mental health.

Misorang: Exactly.

Francheska: You are a very “action-oriented” person. You could have stayed in Australia with a great job as a dentist. Why did you decide to leave all that to come to Korea and spend a whole year doing part-time jobs?

Misorang: One, there was genuine curiosity. I have never done part-time jobs in high school so I wanted to explore more of what life had to offer. Two, at the back of my mind, I always knew I could come back to my dental career, which provided a safe-net for me to try a lot of different things.

Francheska: And it was a LOT! Haha You were in movies, dramas as pedestrian no. 14..

Misorang: Oh yes… as someone’s distant relative, I wore animal characters and handed out flyers on subway exits…

Francheska: AHAHAHAHHA!

Misorang: And during those part-time jobs one of which was a narration model for expos, I “fell” into english broadcasting. Looking back, one of the greatest life lessons I have gained is that sometimes taking detours and side-routes are not such a big deal.

It may seem like I made all the choices easily but I did worry a lot. And if I could go back to my younger self, I would placate her and tell her not to worry too much because I will work hard to make sure I get to where I want to be. And it will all work out.

Francheska: And I am sure you gained so much valuable experiences and insight by taking those detours, right?

Misorang: Absolutely.

Francheska: I asked you this question when we first met over coffee. But how would you define a “beautiful person”?

Misorang: These days, I have come to greatly appreciate people who choose to be “kind” over “right”, especially those who are full of abilities and knowledge. How easy is it to shove facts into others and prove them wrong? That’s the easy part. I feel like the hard part is when you can be the bigger person and choose to be kind, generous.

Francheska: I am in love with that phrase, choosing kind over right. When I was younger, I used to think there were inherently “good” people but now, I understand and have also experienced that good people are “choosing” to be good, purposefully working on being good. That makes me respect them more.

Misorang: Exactly. As I get older… wow everytime I say that I feel like a grandma…

Francheska: Ahahaha same!!

Misorang: As I get “older & wiser” (ahem!) it’s turning out to be truer.

Francheska: Our final and common question for all our amazing Didier Women. Misorang, which brand story of ours, Didier Dubot, touch you the most?

Misorang: There were so many! The D shape message was also very powerful and beautiful, the curvature of the female body. For me, the poppy flower. I like how it can look delicate and beautiful on the outside but possess strength and incredible charm. I would also like to have both inner and outer beauty, you know look like the delicate flower but be a “poison ivy” on the inside haha

Francheska: AHAHAHAHA oh that was such a great one. Your humour and charm is absolutely enchanting. I can tell you that for sure :) *wink*